THE PERILS OF SMOKING or a Day in the Life of Elsie Flateau
Now there was a name to conjure with. Although known to us as Elsie (rather than Hannah) she was universally known as ‘Auntie’, even to several other Government Departments and Contractors. Quite a number of contacts never got to grips with the spelling – Flatow, Flatoo – and occasional mail would simply be addressed to ‘Auntie’ S4d, Atlantic House! She was a lady of indeterminate age, always clad in several layers of clothing since she felt the cold. She did not suffer fools gladly but as I learned she was good to junior staff, patient with explanations and advice about procedures.
But I digress since it is smoking which provides the main theme for this article. Back in those (good) old days, smoking was rife and permitted in the office environment and not just at meal breaks. Two of the chaps smoked pipes, a couple of the ladies an occasional cigarette and one a quite obnoxious continental concoction.
As the EO in charge of S4d Auntie sat in the prime corner of the room and I sat opposite with the in-tray dividers between us. All were hard at work with our ‘guvnor on the phone with the inevitable half-smoked ciggie dangling from her lips. Suddenly we became aware of an acrid smell and a spiral of smoke rising from her voluminous clothing. “Auntie you are on fire” I shouted which resulted in a piercing shriek, over went her chair and she finished up on the floor surrounded by cushions and several files which she used to bolster her height and comfort sitting at the desk.
We quickly damped down the smouldering skirt and restored some dignity. Everything happened so quickly but we were able to avoid summoning the Fire Brigade which would have caused a lot of awkward questions from the management. Tranquillity was soon restored with a cuppa from the Canteen and normality resumed. Auntie was allowed to go home early to calm her nerves – undoubtedly with the help of another cigarette!
But not quite! The tumble had revealed several files about the floor and one in particular required for some time past by Contracts Division.* These often contained confidential contractual information and had defied all attempts by the Division and Main Registry staff to locate it. This resulted in an edict being circulated that on no account should files be used in this manner. The incident did not ban smoking at one’s desk immediately but with the recommendation that the practice be curtailed to meal breaks only. In later years of course, smoking became completely prohibited and so it might be said that Auntie’s episode helped pave the way for this to happen.
*And who was the officer in Contracts Division who so desperately needed this file – none other than a recently arrived direct entrant EO – one Michael Lynn. I wonder if he remembers the incident? It was a long time ago.
John Nash
ex S4d
Hello John, Many thanks for your fine reminiscence: just what HMSOldies needs in this era of gloom. The main rôle in your recollection is taken by Miss Hannah Flateau, who was born on 18 August 1899 and joined HMSO as CO in 1917, being promoted to EO in Supplies in 1937. Your words will bring back many memories for the dwindling group of HMSOveryoldies, and will act as a salient history lesson for others. When I was moved to S4c in 1967 the main players had sadly moved on. You have certainly brightened a dull day in Norwich! Best wishes, Reg.
John Eason adds: And to think that I too indulged in a quiet smoke in that corner, in between dealing with customer departments and colleagues on that very phone (CITy 9876 extension 415). And it was in that seat that I was first introduced to Anne, who later became my governor, so to speak. Happy days!
John Nash adds: As an afterthought, I ought to mention that this article was intended originally for the SO Review. It might be helpful to add a date, to put it into perspective? My own recollection now that it was in the years between 1956-58 but perhaps John Eason can help here? He had recently arrived in HMSO and Bob (Barnard) transferred from Shep Walk.
John Eason adds: I started in HMSO on 16 January 1961. I did Pubns in an hour or so and then got sent to Supplies. Ken Langford and Jim Sergeant displaying their personnel management skills in posting me to a job in Parliamentary Publishing that demanded years of experience. Geoff Brown gave me a cup of tea (provided from her trolley by Lil Dear as she sang Are You Lonesome Tonight), and then I was sent back to Estabs for reconsignment. I would have felt like an unwanted parcel from Amazon if they had existed then. After Auntie and before my arrival, S4d had Arnold Martyn and Daphne Chamberlain as EOs, so I guess John is right about the timescale.
My first week was spent sitting in with the other EOs in S4. Bob Carey, Ernie Gourlay and Frank Ashford. It would have been on day 2 of that week that I was impressed by Tom Herridge ringing up Jack Hedley to congratulate him on his success in The World of Tim Frazer on BBC television. And then shortly after in my early days on S4d John rang a member of ‘The Temperance Seven’ to congratulate him on their hit Pasadena. Blimey! I suppose things like that compensated for the lack of Royal Processions that I had been able to watch from my seat in Middlesex Guildhall on Parliament Square in my previous job. And Gamages was a good substitute for The Army and Navy Stores on Victoria Street. Happy days!